Wit & Wisdom from the
Students of Daniel Light

Daniel Light

Louisville, Kentucky

Teaching piano is my passion and my career. Students frequently delight me with their comments–often hilarious, sometimes witty, occasionally sweet and tender. Here are some of those gems.

“I’m glad I’m playing for Piano Guild. It means I get to skip two hours of saying the rosary.”

–7th grader

“If you don’t practice that piece with a metronome this week, I’m gonna haunt you in your sleep.”

“You’re already in my nightmares.”

–7th grader

“You woke the baby Jesus,” I responded after a boisterous rendition of Silent Night.

“I think if I were being worshipped, I’d at least stay awake for it.”

–5th grader

“My dad said he heard you play a wrong note in church yesterday.”

–5th grader

“Hey, you got a new metronome, Mr. Light! I could have given you mine. I never use it anyway.”

–7th grader

“I wish we had snack time at piano lessons.”

–7th grader

“How was your Red River Gorge weekend?” I inquired.

“Horrible! There was no WiFi.”

–5th grader

“The metronome aggernates me when there’s a ritard.”

–2nd grader

“How much dollars do you have?”

–Kindergartner

“You have the best job in the world, ’cause there’s no one bossing you around.”

–6th grader

“How was Thanksgiving?”

“I lost two teeth and found out my parents are the tooth fairy. That was disappointing.”

–3rd grader

“What’s different?” I asked, demonstrating a drop-lift motion.

“Your hand looks old and wrinkly?”

–5th grader

“Today I had a pinkish-red booger that looked like a diamond. I showed a lot of people.”

–2nd grader

“My grandma gave me a Coke that expired in 2017.

–4th grader

“I saw ‘naked’ in the dictionary today.”

–3rd grader

“To save us all from Santa’s pow’r when we were gone astray.”

–1st grader, misreading lyrics.

“Sometimes I just want to lie on the couch and watch TV.”

–1st grader, on why she hadn’t practiced.

“May the fourth be with you.”

–3rd grader, just before playing a piece that began with the interval of a fourth.

“That sounds like a baby wrote it.”

–3rd grader, after completing a sight-reading exercise.

“I know a naughty version of Yankee Doodle, but I’m not allowed to say it.”

–3rd grader

“Thank goodness it’s finally time to leave!”

–3rd grader

“I left my piano books in the car all week, and mom said I could wear mascara to the father-daughter dance tonight.”

–3rd grader

“Mom’s been gone this week, so Dad just let us eat candy.”

–3rd grader

“Today was opposite day.”
“How did you participate?”
“I combed my hair.”

–9th grader

“You’re more fun than my first teacher. She was kind of . . . serious.”

–3rd grader

“I think I’m growing in my hip.”

–3rd grader

“What does the p mean?” I asked the second grader after he’d played his quiet piece very loudly.

“Penis.”

“You need to get married.”

–1st grader

“You know there are invisible unicorns, right? That’s how you can sneak them into school.”

–3rd grader

“Mom said my breath smells like donkey butt.”

–1st grader

“Your piano is still dusty.”

–3rd grader

“My mom won’t let me get a toad, so I guess I’ll get a parakeet.”

–3rd grader

“I need a nap!” 

–3rd grader

“Why do you suppose Bach wore that powdered wig?” I asked.
“‘Cause he wanted to look famous?”

–2nd grader

“My dad sounds like an elephant when he blows his nose.”

–2nd grader

“I think that’s when my grandma was born, too.”

–2nd grader, observing Beethoven’s date of birth.

“That’s annoying my ears.”

–2nd grader