“To save us all from Santa’s pow’r when we were gone astray.” –1st grader, misreading lyrics.

“That sounds like a baby wrote it.” –3rd grader, after completing a sight-reading exercise.

“I know a naughty version of Yankee Doodle, but I’m not allowed to say it.” –3rd grader

“What does the p mean?” I asked the second grader after he’d played his quiet piece very loudly. “Penis.”

“I need a nap!”  –3rd grader

“Wanna know what I call hand sanitizer? Paper cut locator.” –9th grader